


What Hurts The Most

by aquariusApocalyptic



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Meteorstuck, based on a Broadway karkat song, eridan redemption ark, ok angst time sorta, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-16 21:29:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28713579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aquariusApocalyptic/pseuds/aquariusApocalyptic
Summary: Is it wrong to miss bad people?
Relationships: Eridan Ampora/Karkat Vantas
Kudos: 15





	What Hurts The Most

Is it wrong to miss bad people? You watched him kill your fucking friends, and yet, if you had the chance to go back and change things you would. Even if it meant dooming the timeline. You have no fucking sympathy for that bastard, but you also spend your time yearning for his return. maybe, things could have been different, in another timeline where you shut the fuck up and did something. Maybe if you had talked to him more? maybe if you had done something to put a stop to his duels with sollux? Maybe if you had intervened? Perhaps if you had never sent that memo? Oh well, it's not like you can go back and change anything now. Still, you’ve been searching through the dream bubbles. Looking for any sign of him. You don't know what you’d do if you found him. you still hate his guys, but you just want your friend back. You and Eridan were always close, probably even closer than he and Feferi were, and you had always been secretly flushed for him. Most of your feelings for him had been crushed by watching him kill your friends, but a part of you still holds onto them. 

So here you sit, on the floor of the lab, yearning over Eridan fucking Ampora.

You're tired. You're tired of sgrub. Tired of your friends being dead. You guess you could meet up with them in the dream bubbles, but it hurts. it hurts to imagine the friends you care so dearly about with those empty, dead eyes. but, god, you're so fucking lonely. you can only handle so much of striders dumbassery, terezi rarely talks to you, rose doesn't talk to you at all, your moirallegiance with gamzee was a fucking trainwreck, and you doubt kanaya would me sympathetic to your feelings. If anyone is more pissed at Eridan than you, its kanaya. Hell, you even tried to stop kanaya from killing him. You failed, of course, there’s no way that you can outrun a fucking rainbow drinker.

God you hate that you miss him. You hate it so fucking much. So then why do you miss him?

You’re alone on the lab floor, laying alone in a secluded block, watching a movie. That movie just so happens to be titanic. It was his favorite. The two of you had watched it together at least 40 times. You could recite the whole script word for word.

God you’re tired. You could fall asleep right now.

And that's what happens.

You fall asleep on the floor of the lab, wrapped up in a pile of snuggleplains.

You wake up (well, not really wake up but you know what i mean) in a dream bubble you’ve never seen before. It's a beach, similar to the one where eridan used to live. Whose memory is this? Oh well, it's nice you guess. It's obviously a memory from alternia. You sit on the beach and stare up at the moons. As much as you hate to admit it, it fills you with nostalgia to see this again. It almost reminds you of sitting on the beach outside of Eridan’s hive. 

You look to your left and see- of shit is that Eridan’s hive? Shit.

This is bad. How the fuck do you get out of here? You genuinely have no clue how the dream bubbles work.

Oh well, maybe he isn't here? Or perhaps you will wake up before he finds you? God damnit someone wake you up.

Oh shit.

You hear footsteps.

God fucking damn it, you think they might be Eridans.

You hear a shaky voice call out from behind you, “kar?”

You turn to look at him. He looks pretty much the same, but he’s ditched the cape and wears fewer rings. Oh, and the eyes. You can’t bring yourself to look at them. The same yellow and black eyes of the man you once called a friend are now replaced with a lifeless white.

You want to abscond, but you can’t. You’re frozen in place.

You don’t know weather to be filled with fear, anger, sadness, or maybe a combination of the three. It’s almost fucking pitiful. He’s almost pitiful. 

Almost. 

He would be, maybe if you hadn't seen what you saw.

For once in your life, you’re genuinely speechless. 

“Look, i don’t know why you’re here, or even how you’re here, but just do wwhat you came here to do and go,” and with that he starts to walk away.

You move without thinking and reach for his shoulder, he flinches. Is he afraid of you? Eridan Fucking Ampora, an actual fucking seadweller is afraid of you, a mutant thats much weaker than the average troll, and barely stronger than the average human. You did say that the next time you saw him you would hurt him, but he could literally snap you in half if he wanted to. 

“wwhat are you-” 

“No, shut up and sit the fuck down,” no, stop. Why the fuck are you doing this?

He reluctantly sits down on the beach, you join him.

“Look, just get wwhatevver insults you came to speww at me over an’ then leavve,” the way he talks is quieter than usual. His (fake) overconfidence is now replaced with guilt.”

“Fuck that’s not even why i'm here, just shut up and listen,” you guess you could do that. You could just get out all of the remaining hatred you have for him, but you did that already. Any words of anger and hatred you have for him have already been expressed. 

And he does listen.

“Shit how do i say this?” you try to look at him, but you literally cannot. “Look, i just wanted to say that i regret every single fucking thing i said in that memo. This doesn't mean that you are forgiven, but it does mean that-” you cut yourself off.

“I miss you, eridan.”

And it's true, you do. You miss him so fucking much.

He says nothing, so you continue.

“I miss being able to talk to you, and the longer that i think about it, the more that i regret how i treated you.” 

You’re on the verge of tears. 

You look at him, waiting for a response.

You sit in silence for a minute. 

What you get in response is unexpected, “i missed you too,” he pauses for a second, waiting for a response, he gets none, so he continues, “i didn’t wwant- i didn’t mean to kill em’ kar. I really didn’t. I wwas scared, i wwas stressed. Its been fuckin’ terrifyin’,” he once again looks for a reaction and gets none. “I dont expect forgivveness, but if theres evver a chance for us to talk again, id lovve to take it.”

Fuck you think you are actually crying now. 

So is he.

You respond, in a tone quieter than usual, “yeah, i'd love that too.”

The two of you sit in silence for a moment, your head resting on his shoulder.

It's nice, and for one of the first times in your life your tears are of relief instead of fear or anger.

You wish you could stay here forever. You know you can’t, but oh how you wish.

Then you wake up.

You’re woken up by a sound coming from the other room. 

Shit.

You hope that you can find him. You want to find him again. You hope that what you heard is true. That when the new universe is created, you will be able to reunite with him in life once more.

**Author's Note:**

> i might make another part to this.


End file.
